Why is it so hard for me to write about my prayer and petition. I want to write about some full desire that calls into mind the greatness of the power of God, and the strength that comes from following the precepts of the Lord. Prayers for the peace of the world, and petitions for unity in my community.
But all I can think abut is how I want to be done with the next three assignments I have due, and figure out some other stuff. I want my life to be in order and organized, and to know exactly what is in the plans that God has laid out for me. Even though I know that is not the way it works. We have the grace of flexibility and the freedom of working in the bounds of God’s will.
Though I want to write about the grand philosophical scheme of the one who hurts and intercedes for the people, I cannot do that all the time. I want to leave that to Jesus. He did it, why do I have to do it?
That’s what my disciples do, they follow my example.
Yes Jesus, but it is so hard sometimes.
That is why I gave you the Holy Spirit, so that you may be able to follow me. I never promised you that it would be easy, why do you expect that you will be able to give anything less than your whole life? You cannot serve two (or three or forty-two) gods. Come and join me in the way that leads to life. Only then will you see my children the way I do, in a way that cannot avoid the hurting or look beyond those who are inconvenient.
But God, that takes time. I have papers and exams and relationships and celebrations and life to attend to.
Do you not think that I will celebrate your life with you? Do you not think that I gave you these things to do because I know that you can do them? It is the struggle that I have given you which is teaching you to rely on me. Sooner or later you will realize that you must rely on me to accomplish the things I have laid out for you.
God, I thought I had already learned that lesson, it feels like I’m doing remedial work.
Well, you could have been done, but I suppose that you still have more to learn, and this is preparing you for the next challenge.
Another, God? I’m not sure I can take it.
Use the lessons I have taught you, and the things you have learned from me. Remember that you can call on me for help and strength when you are struggling. Call on me, and I will answer you. Seek, and you will find rest in me.
You do not have to do it alone.